Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Randomize
