my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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