Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
