Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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