Can i not drive my cunt home
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
