Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
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