Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
be right there i have to get my cape
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize