i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Randomize
