The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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