Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
We named our party play list daddy issues
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
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