if you like me you must not know who I am
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
