Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Randomize