your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
