I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize
