I seem to have left my pride at pride
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
