Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
