New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
