She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
