God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize