He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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