hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
