then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize