Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
