No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
