i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
