"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
