Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
