think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Randomize
