im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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