you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
