you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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