What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Never underestimate the power of titties
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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