Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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