After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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