his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
You are the jesus of drinking
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
