she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
