I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
