if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
