your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize
