Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
