just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
