white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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