you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
