and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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