don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
