Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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