He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
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