Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
