I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
