Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Randomize
