Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
